Wouldn’t you love to experience more well-being in your life every day this year?
Who wouldn’t?
The problem is that right now, at the beginning of the New Year, we’re being inundated with messages saying that we need to immediately make some sweeping changes in our lives by taking a course, going on a diet, joining a health club, etc.
My response to all of this is hogwash!
I’ve always felt that the focus on making resolutions and committing to take massive action just because the calendar has rung in the New Year is ridiculous!
Our culture has done an excellent job brainwashing us in believing that it’s a necessity.
To the contrary. It’s not!
So, rather than joining the masses of other folks who are fearful that they’re going to miss out on something powerful if they don’t make massive changes in their lives, I’m offering a radical yet simple approach (that may feel counter-intuitive).
if you follow my suggestions, trust me, you’re going to experience dramatic changes in how you feel over the next couple of weeks.
7 Tips on How to Experience Well-Being Every Day
1. Be Still
I can think of nothing more rejuvenating than taking time during your day to be still. Whether it’s 15 minutes of meditation in the morning or having your cup of morning coffee or tea and gazing out at the winter landscape, just sit quietly and take some deep breaths. Sink into what Neville Goddard called “the awareness of being”.
2. Get grounded.
This phrase may sound a bit trite but it isn’t at all. You can only get grounded when you slow down—really slow down—and start thinking about what really matters to you.
3. Dig deep and own your values.
Spending time thinking about your values and how you want to live your life will reap significant benefits. My suggestion is that you actually keep a notepad where you can jot down whatever comes to your mind over the next few weeks.
For example, some values that are important to me are: integrity, kindness, compassion, creating beauty, connection, authenticity, generosity, and consciousness.
There are no right or wrong answers with this exercise. Write down whatever comes to your mind—this list is for you and you only.
4. Link your values to how you’re actually living each day.
As you read this, you may be thinking “What is Fran talking about?”
What I’m suggesting is not difficult to do. It’s really quite simple.
For example, if one of your values is generosity, spend time assessing how you’re being generous in your life. First, you’ll need to define what generosity means: it could include being generous with your time, expertise, love, money (the list is endless).
A good first question might be “Am I generous to myself?”, followed by “How am I generous to others?” Spend time thinking about how you can integrate your values into your everyday life: In other words, figure out how to live your values.
5. Change the narrative about yourself.
We tend to spend a tremendous amount of time thinking and experiencing life from a scarcity mindset.
Do you ever hear yourself think, “If only I had”…then my life would be so much better.” Do you compare yourself with others and usually come up with the short stick? Do you experience envy, anxiety, frustration, and isolation.
If so, you’re not alone. But that scarcity mindset of “not enough” will keep you stuck and feeling pretty lousy about yourself and your life.
Rather than focusing on what you don’t have and want to change about your life, write down what it is you do have and love about your life and yourself; it may take a few weeks to come up with a list that feels complete to you.
Once you do, close your eyes, visualize what you’ve written down and sink into and experience whatever feelings arise.
For example, one of the things I really like about myself is my ability to laugh. I can easily close my eyes and remember a time when I was guffawing with tears streaming down my face. When I do this exercise, I’m not just remembering but I’m also experiencing it. That moment of ‘remembering and feeling’ brings me a great deal of joy and helps to shift my mood into a more positive and grateful one.
Taking on a mindset of abundance, of what you love that is presently in or has been in your life, will have a dramatic effect on your well-being.
6. Reflect on what you deeply desire.
If someone asked you what you wanted, your first response might be “more money, a larger house, a fancy car, to be able to travel when and wherever I want, etc.”
Those are all perfectly fine things to want in your life.
But usually, below the surface of ‘what you want’ is what you deeply desire.
I can’t tell you what it is but I will tell you if you don’t work too hard at coming up with an answer, your deepest desire(s) will come to you over the next couple of weeks.
A deep desire tends to come from a more spiritual place (but it doesn’t have to).
7. Make bite-size changes in your life.
Every week after the New Year, you see it happen at health clubs. A lot of folks commit to exercising on a regular basis.
Well you know what happens, right?
The first week when they start training, they’re all ‘gung-ho’. They’re telling the trainer about their new diet and how they’ve already lost a few pounds. The second week you notice that they’re not as enthusiastic. And within 6 weeks, they’re rarely showing up.
Unfortunately, these well-meaning people end up experiencing failure and revert to their old habits.
Why didn’t they succeed? In a large majority of cases, it’s because they wanted to believe that they could make dramatic changes in their lives quickly.
Studies consistently show that folks who make very small changes in their life on a daily basis, have a much greater degree of success in the long term.
For example, if you decide to take a walk every day, don’t start off committing to a 30 minute walk. Start with 5 minutes. I know that it may sound silly to initially walk such a short amount of time; but trust me, it works.
Think about it: When you’re snuggled up in your warm bed on a cold day, it’s a lot easier to convince yourself that you can get dressed and brave the cold in order to do a 5 minute walk about vs. 30 minutes.
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “too much too soon”.
When people are changing habits, that’s exactly what they do—too much too soon. So even though it may feel counter-intuitive, if you commit to taking a daily walk, start with 5 minutes for fourteen days and then increase the time to 10 minutes. Every 2 weeks, increase the time another 5 minutes until you’ve worked up to the time that you originally wanted to do.
Please note: I suggest that you integrate one tip into your life each week, rather than trying to address them all within a matter of a week or two. Remember to take it slow and easy!!
Wishing you a magical, playful, and joyful 2017!
With love, xo
Fran
P.S. Your time is almost up to take advantage of the FREE 1000 Digging Deep Book and Course Giveaway. We are almost out of stock and are closing the Giveaway on January 10th (if we have any copies left). To have a copy of Digging Deep sent to you and get immediate access to my 3 part course on “How to Transform and Ordinary Life into an Extraordinary Life”, click here.
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Dear Fran:
In the same vein as your gardening tips, you offer common sense strategies for daily living. I’m the queen of biting off more than I can chew – and then overdoing in the extreme to complete everything I have committed to doing.
The past several months have forced me to step back into my comfort zone (what a concept) and to only do that which I physically can, which has felt oddly satisfying on one hand, yet like I’m letting people down on the other. Always the giver, it has been challenging for me this year, having to rely on others for help. Accepting help when I can’t immediately reciprocate has been very hard for me to do; everyone’s reassurance that this is “payback” for all I’ve done for everyone else in the past has not assuaged my self-assigned guilt.
Facing my impending mortality has made me reflect on what is important in a global way as well as what is important to me in a very small, personal way. Making decisions about how to spend the rest of my life has been easier than I thought it would. It’s the people, not the things or the experiences, that I have chosen to focus on. If I don’t make it to Italy in this lifetime, that’s okay, as long as I can communicate with and visit with friends and family. Always a procrastinator, I’ve joined the do-it-now revolution and I’m not putting off things that are important to me any longer. This is where doing things in bite sized chunks really has made accomplishing this task a reality.
I am doing the thing I most wanted to do — communicating with each relative, each friend, one at a time, a note or a card at a time. I keep a log of who I’ve written to rather than who I need to write to (although I keep post-its with reminders of who not to forget). A list of what I’ve accomplished is far more motivating and gratifying than a list of what I have left to do. I’m also surprised by the number of people who are dear to me and the responses from them have left me in tears at times. I feel loved and cared about and valued. Many have responded with notes telling me how much I’ve impacted their lives as well.
Most importantly, I’ve completed the writing of my “Five Wishes”: what I want for the rest of my life and the end of my life. Although illness forced me to look into this, it’s something I encourage everyone to do. You never know when or how fate is going to intercede in your life and this forces you to have conversations that none of us want to have with our loved ones. That has been my biggest accomplishment of 2016 and I intend to improve on it and build on it in 2917.
Thanks so much for giving me a framework with which to organize and execute my thoughts and the tasks I needed to accomplish this past year and going forward. You’ve motivated me and guided me in so many important ways and I love you for being my friend.
Cathy
Dear Cathy,
Thanks so much for your kind words but the truth is this. Every time you’ve responded to anything on this blog or GGW, you have given readers as much to think about as the writer of the articles have. You are a prolific writer and extremely gifted in so many other ways. What you’ve offered in your comment here is an elegant, authentic, intelligent and yet an incredibly ‘down to earth Cathy Weider style’ of writing….I love your idea of “Five Wishes”. But most importantly, what you are teaching us is that our connections in life are really what matters most-to value and nurture them. What you have endured and continue to deal with on a daily basis is hard to imagine. I am in awe of your resilience and have always deeply admired your engagement in living an incredibly rich and meaningful life. With this response, you continue to inspire. I, my dear friend, am blessed to have you in my life….xo
Okay, you brought tears to my eyes with your very kind comments. A very humble thank you. I am blessed to have you as a friend as well.
Thank you Fran. New Year Resolutions are a burden. I’ve been looking deeply into what my purpose is, passion, desire. I must be very happy with my life. I’m grateful for the life I have. Digging deeper and learning more about myself seems to be a recurring thought. What sparks my passion, purpose, desires. Creativity for one.
Still searching.
Dear Nicki,
Sorry for the delay in responding to you. I know you have been spending time on what is meaningful to you in life….what your purpose is. I think it is a worthy contemplation. Don’t worry….you’re not alone!!!