“I…..say, with ceremony, ‘Thank you, God, for the gift of life.’ It is not much, but it is enough. It is an offering I make….each morning, each evening. 
None of us is promised tomorrow. Today, in all its beauty and sadness and complexity, is all we have. This light we see may be the last such day we have on this earth. There is no certainty, beyond the fact that one day we will have no tomorrow, and that it is not ours to know when that day will be…
Thank you, God, for the gift of life. Thank you, God, for the moment of light.” – Kent Nerburn, Small Graces
Today Is A Sacred Day
Every day is a sacred day. But on this day, the 11th anniversary of 911, I feel the sacredness more.
Early this morning as I sat on my rooftop gazing at the stars and the moon, I prayed.
I prayed for the men and women who died in 911…and for their families who have had to bear a profound loss.
I prayed for a fellow student from seminary who is in the last stages of her journey in this life.
I prayed for my dearest friend and his wife whose brain is riddled with tumors.
I prayed for 2 close friends who have lost their husbands within the past 3 months.
I prayed for all human beings – that we choose to be compassionate, kind, and loving.
4 Simple Sentences: An Exercise In Love
Throughout the morning, I ‘ve been thinking about an exercise that I learned in seminary. It has the power to transform an ordinary conversation into an act of love.
Here it is.
Select a partner and sit face to face. Look deeply into each others eyes.
You say: ‘I’m here to be seen.’
Your partner says: ‘You are seen.’
You continue gazing at each other with your partner silently sending you unconditional love.
The sending and receiving of this energy lasts for 2 minutes. During this time, no words are spoken.
Then you switch roles. She states her needs and you respond with unconditional love.
In the next part of the exercise, you say:
‘I’m here to be heard.’
Your partner says: ‘You are heard.’
You continue to look at each other as your partner silently sends you unconditional love.
Then you switch roles again.
I have participated in this exercise several times. Each time, I’m in awe of the effect it has on me – the feeling of being loved, seen, and heard in a way that I have rarely experienced.
What I just described may strike you as elementary or even a silly exercise. But if you do it with someone you trust, it can be a penetrating experience which leaves a permanent imprint on your consciousness.
It gets to the essence of what we all want while on this earth: to be seen, heard, and loved unconditionally for who we really are.
And what can be more important than that?
“As we open our hearts, we come to see that there is really no difference between giving and receiving. They are just two sides of the experience because neither can exist without the other. It is like imagining breathing without both the inhaling (receiving) and the exhaling (giving). Perhaps if we had a word for the experience of giving that encompasses both aspect, we would see it for what it truly is – one act with two parts, both honorable, both crucial.” – M. J. Ryan, The Giving Heart
photo credit: Adam Foster | Codefor via photo pin cc
That exercise is such a beautiful way to connect, Fran. Thank you for sharing. Love is wonderful! Hugs!
Vidya….it is a wonderful way to connect….as is love. without ever having met you, I know that you are overflowing with love! xxoo-Fran
Fran,
I’ve tried something similar with unconditional love before. There’s nothing like it! Love the two quotes you chose, too.
xoxo
Betsy
Thanks Betsy. I’m not surprised that you have tried something similar. It suits your personality. I just finished watching your friend’s TED video. Whew….he packs a big wallop of wisdom with his words. Fran
That exercise sounds like a very positive thing to do! It sounds simple but I imagine it would evoke a lot of emotions.
Thank you Fran!
Carolyn…Sometimes the simple things are the most profound. And that it was…Thanks for your words Carolyn.
Fran,
Thanks for this uplifting post. That’s one powerful exercise you are suggesting. I call it knee-to-knee time when you sit facing your partner, knees touching and share your heart, one at a time. This is intimacy. This is love! xo
Tess..your words are beautifully written. Doing this exercise is a testament to the power of love that we all have inside of us. It just needs to be accessed. Sitting face to face with another individual and seeing and hearing them for who they really are is a privilege. xxoo
It may sound silly but I bet the exercise works. Conflict often arises when we believe that we are not heard or seen (and therefore loved). If only we can take the time to slow down and assure each other that we do very much care. My relationship with my husband has improved tremendously when we make it a point to sit down and listen to each other with an open heart and a listening ear.
Thanks for sharing the wonderful quotes. I enjoyed reading both of them tremendously!
Evelyn-
As a working Mom with 2 young children, it’s so easy to let ‘listening’ time with your spouse dwindle away. I applaud you for the work you have done in that area.
It’s inevitable that conflict occurs when an individual or group doesn’t feel that they have been heard. The neat thing about really listening and seeing is that they are skills that can be learned. All you need is the desire to make them part of your repertoire. xxoo-Fran
Love this exercise Fran – totally open and loving way to relate and your quotes are perfect. Aaah just lovely to go to bed on. Thank you for this.
LoveElle
xoxo
Elle-Your comment made me smile. What can I say? You are like a fairy godmother sprinkling your magic dust where ever you go. xxoo-Fran
Inspiring exercise, Fran. I can see how it would be beneficial and so unique. Didn’t know you attended seminary. Always fun to learn something new about you. Very touching for our 911 families. I’m thinking about them today as well.
Cathy- Yesterday in Israel 911 wasn’t being talked about. It made me homesick. I got a quick fix on CNN International.
Oh yes indeed- I did go to seminary…an interfaith seminary. It had a huge impact on me and how I am journeying through this phase of life.
It would be interesting to see if the exercise could be useful in dealing with individuals dealing with their addictions. Fran
Thanks for the Love, Fran
be good to yourself
David
David-
I’m always happy to send you love!!
Fran – what a beautiful exercise. I’m definitely going to try it with Dan. I’m sending love to you and to your dear friends who have heavy hearts right now. XO
Jodi- Good idea to do the exercise with your husband. I’ll be curious to hear about it.
You know what’s interesting Jodi? My friends for who I’m praying- they do have pain BUT they are also experiencing beauty, joy, and the ability to stay present.
I was talking with a friend who lost her husband via Skype today. When I saw her face-with her big glowing smile – it melted my heart.
We humans are strong beings. I think most of us don’t know it until we’re tested.
Am so glad that you’re feeling better. xxoo-Fran
Wow!
I could see this being almost terrifying! I sense the emotions you would experience would be overwhelming and powerful.
Knowing that, I can see this bringing such wonderful freeing moments as you open your heart.
Thank You Fran
Nay-
Believe me, I was scared when we were told what to do. But like everything else, when you surrender and work at staying in the moment, magic happens. Thanks for stopping by. Hope to see more of you! Fran
A simple yet very powerful exercise. I did something like this with a group of relative strangers at a conference. It was amazing how much closer we all felt afterward. Any practice that involves looking deeply into another person’s eyes for a prolonged period of time has to be powerful. You’re glancing into each other’s souls.
Thank you for the reminder! My husband and I could definitely benefit from doing this.
Big Hugs!!
Paige-
As you know, the corporate world would be very different if exercises like these were integrated into the culture. I don’t think there’s any of us who couldn’t reap some incredible benefits from it. xxoo-Fran
This sounds silly, but I got chills when I read that. Four simple sentences paced with tremendous power to unlock doors and allow us to connect at a very deep level.
Galen – No, your response is not sill at all. As a matter of fact, it is very moving. I am not surprised that you felt the power and meaning of these 4 sentences. Thanks for your thoughtful comment. Fran